ODE TO HOLIDAY SHOPPING MADNESS

It’s beginning to look a lot like Chaos
Everywhere you are,
Take a look at the grocery stores,
Overcrowded with too many carts and cars,
Kids hanging off the shoppers, the shelves, and the…. doors.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Chaos
As people are swarming into every store,
But the oddest thing you never thought you’d see
Is old Kris Kringle hanging over the top of the shop’s tree
As you shove your way through the crowd and the only door.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Chaos
A pair of heels help you tangle with a discarded skateboard, then as you scoot
Down the aisle sailing head over heel, where you ram into boots,
You hope belongs to dad, not a neighbor from down the street
AH… Just let it be someone you know, that can help you to your feet

It’s beginning to look a lot like Chaos
Anywhere you go
Now there’s a splint on your upper arm
And the Doc says, “Hold still so no more harm
while I sew the gash you got in your head,
when you ran Into the non-slider door.
Never expected to be on the floor.
Expected it to open, eh? It was closed, did you not know?”

It’s beginning to look a lot like Chaos
I should have stayed out of every store,
The happiest I’ll ever be is your opening up for me
And the weirdest thing I get to see
Is my Old Tabby entangled in the Christmas tree
As I hobble in my own front door.

Forget the Nog, bring me some Wine!

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